Hey everyone, welcome back to My Weird Prompts. I am Corn, and I am joined as always by my brother.
Herman Poppleberry, ready and reporting for duty. And Corn, I have to say, the energy in the house has shifted. We have reached a turning point.
We really have. Our housemate Daniel sent us a prompt that feels very close to home because, well, it is literally happening in our home. His son Ezra is six months old now, and the era of the stationary infant is officially coming to a close.
It is the end of an era and the beginning of a much more chaotic one. Ezra is starting to move, and Daniel is looking for some pragmatic, boots on the ground advice for baby proofing. He is in that phase where he is looking at our apartment and seeing it not as a home, but as a series of potential accidents waiting to happen.
It is a common realization for new parents. You spend thirty years looking at a coffee table and seeing a place for your mug. Then you have a mobile infant and suddenly that same table is a jagged monolith designed specifically to target a forehead. Daniel mentioned he is already decluttering and has bought some basics like edge protectors and cable management tools, but he wants to know what the essentials are for this next month.
I love that he is starting now. The best time to baby proof is about two weeks before you think you need to. Because the day you say, oh, he is not quite crawling yet, is exactly the day he decides to lunge for the power strip behind the sofa.
Exactly. And Daniel had some specific questions about cleaning and technology, like whether vacuuming once a day is enough and if their robot vacuum is actually a secret hazard for a crawling baby. We should definitely dive into those. But first, Herman, let us talk about the small apartment factor. We live in Jerusalem, and as our listeners know, space is often at a premium here. Daniel mentioned their place is relatively small with a lot of rooms and corners. How does that change the baby proofing strategy compared to, say, a sprawling suburban house?
That is a great place to start. In a smaller apartment, every square inch is high traffic. You do not have the luxury of just closing a door to a formal dining room and forgetting about it. In a small space, the zones of play and the zones of living are often the same. This means your baby proofing has to be more integrated. You cannot just create a gated off play area and call it a day. The whole apartment effectively becomes the play area.
Right, and in these older Jerusalem buildings, you have got a lot of stone, a lot of tile, and very few soft landings. I think the first thing Daniel should focus on, which he mentioned, is those edge protectors. But Herman, is it just about the corners of tables? I feel like there are a lot of hidden edges we do not think about.
Oh, absolutely. People always go for the coffee table first, which is smart, but they forget about things like the underside of the kitchen counter overhang. When a baby is learning to stand, they do not just walk into things. They push themselves up and then lose their balance. That is when they hit the underside of things or the sharp edges of lower cabinets. And in a small apartment, you probably have furniture that serves multiple purposes. Maybe a trunk that doubles as a table. Those often have heavy lids and metal latches. Those are much more dangerous than a standard wooden table corner.
That is a good point. The verticality of the danger changes. When they are six months old, they are on the floor. But by seven or eight months, they are pulling up. Daniel asked about the essentials for the next month. To me, the absolute number one essential that people often overlook until it is too late is anchoring furniture.
Corn, you are hitting on my biggest obsession. Tip over accidents. This is not just a suggestion, it is a mathematical necessity. According to the Consumer Product Safety Commission, a child is sent to the emergency room every forty-five minutes because of a falling piece of furniture or a television. If you have a dresser or a bookshelf, and a twenty pound human pulls on the top drawer, the center of gravity shifts forward instantly. Most furniture is not designed to stay upright under those conditions.
And in a small apartment, we tend to stack things. We have tall, narrow shelves because we want to maximize vertical space. Those are the most unstable. Daniel, if you are listening, get those anti tip straps for everything. The bookshelf in the hallway, the dresser in the bedroom, even the television if it is on a stand. Do not assume that because it feels heavy to you, a baby cannot tip it. It is all about leverage. In the United States, the STURDY Act recently went into effect to make furniture safer, but in older buildings like ours, we are dealing with legacy furniture that was never tested for this.
It really is. And it is a quick fix. You can buy these kits for a few dollars. It takes ten minutes with a drill, and it can literally save a life. It is the highest return on investment for safety. Now, Daniel also mentioned cable management. This is where he and I usually nerd out together, but now the stakes are different.
Right, because before, a messy cable was just an eyesore. Now, a cable is a vine that leads to a prize. And the prize is usually something heavy and expensive that will fall on your head if you pull the vine hard enough.
Exactly. And it is also a strangulation hazard and an electrocution hazard. For a six month old, a cable is the most interesting thing in the room. It has a weird texture, it moves when you touch it, and it usually tastes like plastic, which apparently babies love. Daniel should look for those hard plastic cord channels that adhere to the baseboards. Do not just bundle them with velcro. You want to hide the existence of the cable entirely. If they cannot see it, they won't pull it.
What about the outlets themselves? Everyone buys those little plastic caps, but I have heard mixed things about them.
Those little clear plastic inserts are okay, but they are a pain for adults to get out, and ironically, once a kid gets a bit older, they become a choking hazard themselves if they manage to pry them out. A better solution, especially for a small apartment where you are constantly plugging and unplugging things like a vacuum or a phone charger, are the sliding outlet covers. You replace the actual faceplate with one that has a spring loaded shutter. When you pull the plug out, the shutter snaps shut. No small parts, no way for a baby to stick a fork in there.
That sounds much more elegant. Now, let us get to Daniel's specific question about cleaning. He asked if vacuuming once a day is sufficient. My first thought is, why once a day? Is that a lot or a little? When you have a baby crawling, the floor is essentially their dinner plate.
It really is. Think about what is on a floor. Dust, pet hair if you have it, small bits of debris from shoes, and then the things we drop. The biggest risk for a six month old isn't actually germs, it is choking hazards. This is where the once a day vacuuming might not be the right metric to look at.
Right, it is more about the scan. We call it the penny test or the toilet paper roll test. If an object can fit through a toilet paper tube, a baby can choke on it.
Exactly. Vacuuming is great for the microscopic stuff and the dust, which is important for allergies and general health, but vacuuming once a day won't save you from the coin that fell out of your pocket three hours later. In a small apartment, things congregate in corners. I would tell Daniel that instead of focusing on a scheduled deep clean once a day, he needs to develop the habit of the low level scan. Every time you walk into a room, look at the floor from the perspective of someone whose eyes are four inches off the ground.
That is the key. You have to get down on your hands and knees. It sounds ridiculous, but if you want to baby proof a room, you have to crawl through it. You will see the staple that's stuck in the carpet, the loose thread on the rug, the dead battery under the radiator. Things you would never see from a standing height.
I actually did that once when my nephew was visiting. I found a small screw that had fallen out of a door hinge months ago. It was just sitting there, perfectly sized for a baby's airway. So, Daniel, vacuuming once a day is a great habit, especially for the dust and the Jerusalem grit that comes in through the windows, but the manual scan is what keeps the baby safe from choking.
Now, let us talk about the robot vacuum. Daniel is worried it might be a threat to a crawling baby. I can see why. It is a moving, whirring, semi autonomous disc of plastic. From a baby's perspective, it's either a terrifying monster or the coolest toy ever made.
It is almost certainly going to be the coolest toy ever made. And that is actually the problem. Most modern robot vacuums, the ones from the last few years, have pretty sophisticated sensors. By twenty twenty-six, most mid range models have artificial intelligence obstacle avoidance that can detect even small objects or pets. They are not going to run over a baby like a steamroller. They have LiDAR or optical sensors that see an obstacle and move around it. The physical threat of being hit by the vacuum is actually quite low. They move slowly and they have bumpers.
So the vacuum isn't going to hurt the baby, but could the baby hurt the vacuum? Or, more importantly, could the baby hurt themselves interacting with it?
That is the real issue. Babies love buttons. Most robot vacuums have a big, shiny power button right on top. Ezra is going to press that button constantly. He is going to try to sit on the vacuum. He is going to try to stick his fingers in the rotating side brushes. While those brushes aren't powerful enough to cut a finger, they can certainly pinch or cause a fright.
And then there is the hygiene aspect. Robot vacuums are literally designed to collect the grossest stuff on your floor. The underside of that machine is not something you want a six month old touching and then putting their hands in their mouth.
Absolutely not. It is a rolling petri dish. My advice for Daniel would be to schedule the robot vacuum to run only when Ezra is in a different room or out for a walk. Do not have it running while he is on the floor playing. It is too much of a distraction and a potential point of conflict. Also, if your robot vacuum has a dock, make sure the dock is in a place where Ezra cannot easily reach it. Those charging pins are live. While they are low voltage, sticking a wet tongue or a metal toy on them is not a great idea.
I also want to bring up something that happened in the news a while back. I think it was back in episode one hundred and twelve when we talked about smart home privacy. But there is a more visceral concern with robot vacuums and babies, or rather, babies and their occasional accidents.
Oh, the poop-pocalypse.
Exactly. If Ezra has a diaper leak while he is crawling around, and the robot vacuum is on its scheduled run, it does not always recognize a mess as an obstacle. It recognizes it as something to be spread evenly across the entire apartment.
It is the stuff of nightmares. Some of the high end models now have AI object recognition specifically trained to avoid pet waste, which would presumably work for human waste too, but you do not want to be the test case for that technology. So, rule number one: never run the robot vacuum unsupervised when a baby is on the loose.
That seems like a very solid, pragmatic rule. Now, Herman, Daniel mentioned he lives in a small apartment with many rooms and corners. We have talked about edges, anchoring, and cleaning. What about the doors? In a small place, doors are constantly opening and closing. And in Jerusalem, we have those heavy Mamad doors, the reinforced security room doors.
Oh, those are finger guillotines. A Mamad door is made of heavy steel. If that slams on a tiny finger, it is a life changing injury. For those, you need heavy duty door stops that prevent them from moving at all when the baby is nearby. For regular doors, finger pinches are still a huge deal. As babies start to move, they love to grab onto door frames for support. If a breeze catches a door or another person in the house closes it without looking, it can be devastating. You can get these simple foam C shaped guards that slip onto the top or side of the door. They prevent the door from closing all the way. It is a two dollar fix that prevents a trip to the emergency room.
And what about the bathroom? In our apartment, the bathroom is right off the main living area.
The bathroom is a high security zone. For a crawling baby, the toilet is basically a giant water bowl at eye level. It is a drowning hazard, believe it or not. Even a few inches of water can be dangerous for an infant who cannot pull themselves up. Daniel needs a toilet lock. It is a simple latch that keeps the lid down. And he should probably keep the bathroom door closed at all times.
It is interesting how baby proofing is partly about hardware, but it is mostly about habit. Closing the door, scanning the floor, checking the anchors. It is a lifestyle shift.
It really is. It is about moving from a reactive mindset to a proactive one. Most people wait until the baby almost falls or almost grabs something before they fix it. But at six months, you have this tiny window where you can see the mobility coming but it is not quite here yet. This is the month to do the heavy lifting.
Let us talk about the kitchen for a second. Daniel mentioned he's already decluttering. In a small kitchen, we often keep things on the bottom shelves that are convenient for us, like heavy pots or cleaning supplies.
That has to change immediately. Anything toxic, obviously, needs to go into a high cabinet. Do not rely on those plastic cabinet latches for the really dangerous stuff. Those latches are great for keeping a kid out of the Tupperware, but some kids are remarkably good at figuring them out or just pulling hard enough to break them. If it is bleach or heavy duty cleaner, it needs to be physically out of reach, not just behind a latched door.
What about the oven? In small apartments, the oven is often right there in the middle of everything.
Oven locks are a thing, and also stove knob covers. If you have a gas stove like we do in Jerusalem, it is very easy for a leaning baby to accidentally turn a knob and start a gas leak. Those clear plastic covers that go over the knobs are essential. And for the oven door itself, they make heat resistant locks. But the biggest thing is just the habit of using the back burners whenever possible.
That is a classic piece of advice, but it is so important. Handles turned inward, back burners only. It seems like a lot to remember, but I suppose it becomes second nature after a while.
It does. It is like driving a car. At first, you are thinking about the blinker and the brake and the mirrors, and then you just do it. But Daniel asked what he should focus on over the next month. If I had to give him a checklist, it would be this: One, anchor all tall furniture. Two, cover the outlets and manage the cables. Three, get the edge protectors on the obvious hazards. And four, establish the cleaning and scanning routine.
I would add one more to that list: the poison control number. In Israel, the National Poison Information Center is zero four, eight five four, one nine zero zero. It is one of those things you hope you never need, but you want it programmed into your phone and stuck on the fridge before you need it. Especially when they start exploring with their mouths.
That is a great point. And also, check your plants. A lot of common houseplants are actually toxic if ingested. In a small apartment, we love our greenery, but things like lilies or certain types of ivy can be really dangerous for a baby who decides to have a snack.
I hadn't even thought of that. You see a plant as decor, they see it as a salad.
Exactly. Everything is a potential meal at six months. Which brings us back to Daniel's vacuuming question. Is once a day sufficient? If you are doing a manual scan of the floor several times a day, then yes, once a day for the actual vacuuming is probably fine for most people. But if you have a high shed pet or live in a particularly dusty area, you might find you want to do it more often. The main thing is the floor needs to be clear of small objects.
I think the takeaway for the robot vacuum is also clear. It is a great tool for maintenance, but it is not a substitute for the parent's eyes. And it shouldn't be a playmate for Ezra.
Definitely not. Keep the robot for the off hours. And Daniel, if you are looking for a pragmatic tip for those corners, sometimes the best baby proofing is just moving the furniture. If you have a table with a sharp corner that is right in a walkway, see if you can rotate it or move it to a less high traffic area. Sometimes the simplest solution is just changing the layout.
That is the beauty of a small apartment. You have fewer options, but you also have less ground to cover. You can really master the safety of a small space in a way that is harder in a huge house.
It is a controlled environment. You can make it a very safe, very fun laboratory for Ezra to explore. Because that is the other side of this, right? You do not want to turn your home into a padded cell. You want it to be a place where he can learn to move and explore without being constantly told no or being whisked away from danger.
That is a really important point, Herman. If you baby proof well, you actually have to parent less in some ways. You are not constantly on edge because you know the environment is safe. It gives the baby more freedom and the parents more peace of mind.
Precisely. It is about creating a yes space. A place where the baby can go almost anywhere and do almost anything, and the answer is yes, you can explore that. That is much better for their development than a home where every corner is a hazard and every movement is met with a panicked grab from a parent.
I love that concept of a yes space. Especially in a small apartment, making the whole living area a yes space is a great goal. So, Daniel, focus on those anchors, get those cables under control, and start practicing your low level crawl. You might be surprised what you find under the sofa.
I found a missing sock and a five shekel coin under mine last week. Both are hazards in their own way.
Very true. Well, this has been a great deep dive into the practicalities of baby proofing. It is one of those topics that feels overwhelming at first, but when you break it down into these categories, it is very manageable.
It really is. And to all our listeners who have been through this, we would love to hear your weirdest baby proofing hacks. What did you use that wasn't actually a baby proofing product? I have seen people use pool noodles for edge protectors or tennis balls on chair legs.
Oh, the pool noodle trick is a classic. If you have any tips or stories about your own baby proofing adventures, or if you have a prompt for us like Daniel did, please get in touch. You can find us at our website, myweirdprompts dot com. There is a contact form there, and you can also find the link to our Spotify where you can subscribe.
And if you are enjoying the show, we would really appreciate it if you could leave us a review on your favorite podcast app. It genuinely helps other curious people find the show. We have been doing this for two hundred and twenty seven episodes now, and it is the community of listeners that keeps us going.
It really does. We have covered everything from data brokers to the math of uninterruptible power supplies, and now baby proofing one hundred and one. It is all part of the weird, wonderful world we live in.
Thanks for the prompt, Daniel. Good luck with Ezra's new mobility. It is going to be a wild ride.
It definitely is. Thanks for listening to My Weird Prompts. We will be back next week with another deep dive into whatever is on your mind.
Until then, keep scanning those floors and stay curious.
This has been My Weird Prompts. See you next time.
Bye everyone!
Herman, I think we should actually get a few of those door pinch guards for the kitchen. I nearly caught my own finger in there this morning.
You see? Baby proofing is for everyone. I will add it to the shopping list.
Perfect. Alright, let us go see if Ezra has found any more hidden treasures on the rug.
I am on it. I will get down on all fours right now.
That is the spirit. Talk to you later, Herman.
Later, Corn.
And thanks again to Daniel for the great topic. It is always fun to explore the practical side of these life transitions.
It really is. It makes the world feel a little bit more understandable, one anchor strap at a time.
Well said. Alright, signing off for real now. Goodbye!
Goodbye!
